My Edinburgh Rant

Well, it was bound to happen…something was going to attempt to ruin my week in Edinburgh…and that something was CASTLE ROCK HOSTEL.

For the week we’d been in a very lovely apartment, however for my last night (the girls were staying two more nights) we had to move to the above mentioned hostel.

Now, I’ve used hostels for some years now. I’m a fully paid up member of the YHA, and I have hosted my annual Winter Ball in one of two splendid YHA venues for the last five years, and held treasure hunts at others, as well as ad hoc staying at hostels – so I’m quite used to them.

CASTLE ROCK HOSTEL (part of the Backpackers Hostel it should be noted, and NOT YHA) brought a whole new experience for me.

It actually started the day before. I called them to see what time check in was, to which I received a very curt response before they hung up. I didn’t even get to ask whether we could leave luggage with them.

I decided as I had an early train on the Saturday to take my case, packed with everything and anything I didn’t need on my person, down to left luggage at Waverley Station, thereby saving me the pain of taking it there at the ungodly hour I was getting there the next day.

Upon check in at the hostel, we were asked to sign into a book, putting in our name, address and either driver’s license number, passport number or NI number…none of which I had as they were in my case. The conversation that followed went something along these lines:

Me: I’m sorry, my driver’s license and passport are both in my case at Waverley Station and I don’t know my NI number.

Her: You could go to the station and get them.

Me:  Erm, no I couldn’t actually, sorry.

Her: But we need either your driver’s license number, passport number or NI number.

Me: If I don’t provide you with them am I not allowed to stay here?

Her: No you can still stay here. But you could still go to the station and get them.

Me: No I’ve already said I can’t. I have a show in just over an hour. Plus I’m not going all the way down to the station, pay to get my case out of left luggage to retrieve my license, to then have to put my case back into left luggage only to pay again tomorrow to get it back out.

Her: But we need the number. Every hostel needs this information before someone can stay.

Me: Actually that bollocks. I’m a YHA member and never have I been asked.

Her: Ah yes, but you give them your YHA number.

Me: True, but then, they tell us that we need to bring the YHA card.

Her: It was on the email…

Me: No it wasn’t.

Her: Well it’s on our website…

Me: I didn’t go on your website… (subsequent checking has proved it’s not on the website either btw)… What if I give you the last four digits of my debit card?

Her: You could put down all the long number.

Me: I’m not about to write down the 16 digits of a card linked to my bank when my name and address are right next to it…

Her: Work with me here…

Me: I’m trying. Look, why do you need the number?

Her: In case something happens to you whilst you are here. It’s so we can contact your bank or the DVLA and get your details so we can contact your next of kin. I don’t see the problem, most people have their passport on them when travelling.

Me: Well you can’t be given my details, data protection act stops people from giving you that, anyway you already have my home address. How about I write down my next of kin details? I’ll happily write down my husband’s number.

Her: That won’t work.

Me: How can that not work? You’ve said you needed the information so that you could get my next of kin details in case I die whilst here…I’m willing to just GIVE you my husband’s number…THAT’S my next of kin details right there.

Her: We still need a driver’s license number, passport number or NI number.

Me: <writes down husband’s number>

I mean seriously, WTF??? I so very nearly walked out. Can say I will NEVER use that hostel again. Bad form. You don’t talk to people like that. You certainly don’t talk to people who are paying for your service like that.

Turns out no sockets in the rooms (!?!), the bunk beds were little more than slabs of plywood with a mattress on (not comfortable), top bunk had no sides to stop you from rolling off and my mates report sightings of mice on the Saturday. Website, should you want to avoid them is http://castlerockedinburgh.com/

Show twelve...Morgan & West: Time Travelling Magicians

This was one of the shows I was most excited about seeing for a couple of reasons. Firstly, I LOVE magic, especially sleight of hand. Secondly, I love men in frock coats and waistcoats. This show was to give me both!

Now I may get this review out of order on the tricks front, my excitement really made writing my notes afterwards very difficult.

Photo from www.morganandwest.co.uk

Morgan & West, two rather spiffingly dressed chaps looking very handsome in their finery, completely held my attention for the time they were on stage…and I certainly wasn’t alone in that. They had very good comic timing and banter – obviously a good rapport between them.

 

Their magic was traditional, often with their own spin on it.

The “all seeing eye in the hand” trick was very Derren Brown (a compliment) and executed well. They also performed towards the end another DBesq trick relating to Harry Potter (but I forgive them for that) involving predicting which book, page and word would be chosen by a willing member of the audience.

West performed a spellbinding back and forth coin trick, which I’ve discovered is very hard to convey to others quite how it looked and how remarkable it was. I shall try again now, but please forgive me if it doesn’t quite sound as impressive as it should! Take the traditional appearing/disappearing coin trick…now let’s see the trick progress and then reverse…then progress more…and then reverse…and progress more etc until he performs the whole trick forwards and then backwards. I think I sat open mouthed throughout this whole trick. One question I meant to ask the gents was whether the red/blue light signifying travelling forwards or backwards was an intentional match to the time vortex colours when Doctor Who is travelling forwards or backwards in the T.A.R.D.I.S. – or am I just being a little too geeky and it’s pure coincidence?

Now my favourite trick is bound to be the one where I got to go on stage with West, whilst Morgan chose another woman. She had a green backed deck of cards, whereas mine was purple. We both chose and signed cards, before having them change into another card mere inches away from us (cue my impression of a guppie). It was then revealed that our cards were no longer in our packs but had made it over the other side of the stage and were in each other’s packs (cue bigger impression of a guppie). The cards were then brought back and were handed to us – I’m now keeping mine proudly in my purse.

Me and my West card

They ended the show with cup/ball tricks in the form of an old fashioned instructional film which was both striking and witty.

 

So what is my opinion of them? LOVE THEM!!! Part of me wishes I’d gone to see them earlier in the week so I could’ve justified seeing them again. I have, however decided that I want to be rich enough to have them as my own personal magicians…unless they ever need a “glamorous assistant” as I can pull off a corset quite nicely.

 

If you get the chance, either see them in Edinburgh, hire them for an event, or if they are performing anywhere else, buy that ticket! These gents WILL be well known before long!

http://www.morganandwest.co.uk/

Show eleven...Norman Lovett: LOL :)

This show was delivered at exactly the pace that any Red Dwarf fan would expect from this man. His dead pan face and voice make for an even paced show…some may say slow, but it never felt like it.

Photo from www.edfringe.com

 

Unfortunately for Norman, he was faced with a very loud and drunk local heckler, one who shouted out incoherently several times, left to get himself a pint, then left again for the loo, by which time most of the audience and I think Norman himself were hoping he wouldn’t return. Alas he did and sadly still insisted on butting in on the show. I don’t even think he realized that he was being very annoying to everyone who were enjoying the show.  However Norman dealt with him very well and in a manner only he could.

Anyhoo, the show involved Norman generally chatting whilst rifling through a bag of assorted items. A main theme through them was plastic bags (think “American Beauty”). Being shown the differences between thin white plastic, Subway bags, M&S bag, black bin liner, white bin liner and even a shower cap (doing a marvelous jellyfish skit). All the while Norman was just chatting about random things, all very amusing and having you wondering where things were going next.

For me the highlight, apart from kicking off Doctor Who war, was when he brought out an old fashioned wooden peg (the type you make proper peg dolls from). This, he stated, was a upper class peg…before bringing out a wooden “modern” peg, which was more “working class”. Cue an abstract conversation between the two pegs before the working class one attacked the posh peg. He then brought out two plastic “modern” pegs that were the chav pegs. For whatever reason this little section really tickled me.

So a very pleasant and funny show, ruined only a little by the pissed up twat but that was trumped by Barry Cryer being in the audience.

Ta-ra Edinburgh...

Well that's it...it's over.  Edinburgh is over for another year, only a few months until I start planning next year's trip!

I have several reviews still to type up, and other bits and pieces including what could be a most wonderful rant.

However this morning I amused myself by walking down a very empty Royal Mile before seven o'clock...amused because the last time I walked on it (last night) the Tattoo had just let out and the Royal Mile couldn't be seen for Argyle sweaters and anoraks.

Got to the station stupidly early, grabbed breakfast and waited patiently for the train.  Just on it until Newcastle where my parents and Baby Girl are meeting me (can't wait, haven't seen her in three weeks!).  Then we drive to Peterborough services to meet up with the meester and older girls, transfer cars before heading to Wisbech for the wedding of two friends of ours.  We were going to be camping overnight there but to be honest after a week on a sofa and one night in a hostel (more on the hostel in a later blog!), well, I want to sleep in my own bed next to my husband tonight.

We've just pulled into Alnmouth (for Alnwick don't you know!) so only half an hour until Newcastle.

In a nutshell, my week in Edinburgh has been fabulous, with only a couple of meh points.  Quite frankly there were far too many highs for the mehs to really affect it other than whilst they happened.

Words to sum up?  Peg-legged pirates, two messiahs - one false and one true, Pissed Priss, pole dancing Lee extended cabaret, cold late night, lovely flatmates, vomit, semi-naked Lee, marvellous magicians, most excellent facial hair, henna, vanilla vodka, drinks with friends...that'll do for now...

So ta-ra Edinburgh...catch you in about 12 months x

Shows, garlands and vomit

Well I find myself about 36 hours away from leaving Edinburgh, and I am knackered and happy, with still a writing workshop and some shows left to go!  Those who have been following the reviews will see that I've been to one or two shows since leaving Pissed Priss at Waverley station.

Somehow the weather has stayed pretty much unbelievably good - with nothing more than the occasion shower!

Monday found me having quite a bit of a lie in due to the late night, however soon enough I was off down to the National Gallery for The Impressionist Gardens.  On the way I succeeded in finding these hair garlands everyone has been wearing - all three of us had wanted one too - so purchased three and continued to the gallery.  Post exhibition I returned to the flat and basically did not very much except have a soak in the bath and fall asleep.

Tuesday was another day filled with shows and much walking, getting accidentally merry in the afternoon after seeing The Sweeney.  I ended up boring the pants off a family for about an hour - well, I thought we were all having a nice chat, but upon coming out of the ladies loos I saw the dad, daughter & fiance with the dad being very unsubtle in his "shushing", eyes fixed on me and head indicating...hmmmm, not sure what I said that offended and it's not like I held them at the next table against their will. :rolleyes:  They girls rolled in rather late and shall we say somewhere around half past pissed o'clock?

Wednesday morning started with a bit of a surprise...and not a good surprise...

Early up & the usual morning bathroom visit, only to be faced with a sink almost over-flowing with vomit.  I'm sure I need not describe the sight and smell.  As you can imagine, it's not a sight that is a pleasing one.  

I went into Mum mode temporarily...I looked at the clock - 0856 - hmmmm, so very tempted to drag the two unconscious girls from their bed to discover who was responsible...but then I thought "hell, we've all been there, I'll give them more time before they (whichever responsible) can clear it all up".  By lunchtime they were alive...sadly no hangovers (how is THAT even fair??)...and the younger of the girls, for it was she who had mixed far too many of the wine and vodka varieties, set to work attempting to return the bathroom to normal.

Has to be said, she'd obviously done a good job of being rather ill as she still needs to hunt for some sink and drain unblocker...

Show ten...Ardal O'Hanlon

Let me start straight off with an audience observation...unlikeliest audience member for an Ardal O'Hanlon show (IMO) was a shaved headed chap...all except for a circle of hair right at the back that had been grown very long and French plaited...just didn't scream "Father Ted/My Hero" fan.

Photo from www.edfringe.com

Ardal was exactly as I imagined he would be, ie every sense of the words lovely, sweet & funny.  What he gave was a thoroughly enjoyable show.  There were lots of laughs throughout the whole thing, the occasional big hearty laugh, but generally a good level.

He came out on stage to a huge round of applause & cheers, playing up to it saying it made him feel all worthy so could be possibly have just one more? (which was duly given).  About two minutes later two later comers arrived and he informed them they were to do their part re cheering...which they eventually did.  Ardal then told them we'd also made a bear noise for him, and could they make a bear noise too?  Bless the chap from the couple if he didn't make the tiniest bear noise ever!

Various highlights for me.  Discussing his horny pregnant wife looking like an Easter egg in her dress with a big bow on it, who would then get distracted by a sudden need for food before crying - ah I remember those days.  Discussing his eco-daughter and Alvin/Beelzebub son.

Ardal proceeded to call the Pope a liar, demanding that he resign as should various high ranking Priests...and that God should also consider his position because "he really had to know what was going on".  Possibly the childishly funniest line has to be about the Pope hiding priests under his cassock...and "which is basically an anagram of cock and ass and we all know that anagrams don't lie!"

So overall the show was lovely, glad I've seen him.  If you haven't seen him and are a fan of the shows he's been on, then he's worth going to see...but possibly only the once.

Oh...and he's starting to look very like Greg Kinnear...

Show nine...The Rupert Pupkin Collective...again

To be honest I could go and see these gents every day and not be bored, and at this show we were treated to a special guest as Dave Johns had to head home early. Joining Steve Steen, Stephen Frost, Andy Smart and Ian Coppingger was Aussie comedian Adam Hills.

Photos from www.edfringe.com

An early game called film and theatre styles provided the most shocking, loudest and longest laughs...set in a coal mine, Ian and Adam were on stage and the film style "pirate movie" was suggested. Cue Ian doing a lot of argh argh aaaaaaaaaargh argh argh aaaaaaaaargh aaaaaaarghs...Adam just stood there before saying "sod it", lifted up his right trouser leg and unbuckled his false leg to reveal a very convincing pirate peg leg...the lengths some comedians will go to for laughs never ceases to amaze me! hehehe

It would also appear that there were quite a few audience members didn't know about Adam's leg...I can only imagine just how shocked they must've been.

Anyway the whole audience were laughing and laughing and laughing...it was very hard to stop...Frosty even suggested we took a break for a few minutes for people to collect themselves.

In the game "Meanwhile" were many funny moments. Opening with a casino scene played out in pigeon French, Ian interrupted asking "ou est la bibliotheque?"...a theme that ran through various other scenes.  The Irish dancing class was a stroke of genius, especially with Ian getting Frosty to perform the "kick a Brit in the face" move...performed obviously on the Aussie.  Another one that tickled me was In the Playground where Andy was jumping around stating "I'm being Spiderman"

The last game was once again a dubbed Sherlock Holmes case, this time the Case of the Missing Sausage.  Lots of cheap sausage gags...we likes cheap sausage gags.

Sadly this was the Pupkins last show this EdFest. So very pleased I came back and saw them - well done to Adam for jumping in there, he did well :)

Show eight...The Sweeney - The Life and Times of Jim Sweeney

I missed the first (IIRC) showing of this at The Comedy Store in London back in December last year due to having pneumonia, and very nearly missed this show due to a lost booking until a very kind chap helped me out, something I am very grateful for.

Photo from www.edfringe.com

A packed out room full of people wanting to see this documentary Jim made was buzzing with anticipation.

The screen flickered into life to see Jim, hunched over in his chair, slow drawn out speech, looking like a very frail man, introducing his documentary...half the audience begin to laugh, much to the shock from the other half...I know the chap next to me tutted in my direction...until Jim sits up straight and asks "Too much?" - queue belly laughs from the whole audience.

For those not in the know, Jim has MS.  But that's not really important...the fact that he is an impro god and very talented man is the important bit.

The documentary is Jim talking to Lee Simpson in his garden, recounting many tales of his life, often split in with other comedians and people from Jim's life telling their version of the same story...sometimes those sides even agree!  Among those featured were all the rest of the CSPs (Lee (not just as interviewer), Neil Mullarkey, Josie Lawrence, Andy Smart, Richard Vranch and Paul Merton), Steve Steen, Steve Frost, Suki Webster, Mike McShane, Eddie Izzard, Greg Proops, Barbara, Dom, Mark and the lovely Jools from The Store and many others.

We are treated to wonderful archived (oh that sounds so wrong - makes Jim sound ancient, which he's not!) tv footage (although no breeches from Blackadder III - forgive as we do get to see him in S&M get up doing a tango) and photos.  These photos take us through an impressive amount of curly hair...I like to think that Jim donated his hair time and time again and somewhere in the world, probably Liverpool, are a lot of very curly Sweeney wigs.

The entire room is filled with huge belly laughs...you know the type I mean, the ones that give you a stitch whilst also giving your abs a damn fine work out, and you feel a little bit tired afterwards.

Throughout there have been clips of Jim's last show at The Store...this is the place where I've had the pleasure of seeing him perform 2-300 times...I can't even be sure it's only that many...but sadly I couldn't make his final show.  I'll admit I welled up at his little goodbye speech, actually it was when he said the word "goodbye" rather than anything else.  I miss seeing Jim perform.  I miss him owning the whole room.  Miss him having us all hanging on his every word before creasing up...I hold him personally responsible for me choking on drinks on more than one occasion (I soon learnt not to take sips if he was on stage!).

Anyhoo, I digress and he'd hate me gushing about him, so will just state that the above is bollocks, he's completely average and I don't miss him at all - there, that should balance it up a bit.

The proceeds from the screening is going to the Multiple Sclerosis Research Centre. Richard and Mike were outside with collection boxes too.  

Should you want to see the film yourself, you can pre-order it on dvd (I already have a while ago!) from Jim's website (and also see a clip) http://www.thesweeney.net/ - I urge you to do this, as again, all profits from sales also go to th Multiple Sclerosis Research Centre...which means you get to do something nice for charity and get to have a laugh whilst doing so!

I shall leave you with a photograph I took of Jim at my first ever EdFest in 2004 - I love this photo :-)

Show seven...Just a Minute recording

JAM is a show I've listened to on a number of occasions when I've either remembered or discovered it on the radio, and I've always found it quite amusing...and quite amusing is just how it is.  It isn't die hard laugh a minute and it isn't dull.  It had high moments, and to be honest, this recording had some shudder creepy moments.

Nicholas Parsons is the host, with Paul Merton and Gyles Brandreth firmly in place, guests were Shappy Khorsandi and John Bishop (making his first appearance).

Without a doubt, new comer John Bishop stole the show - which surprised me as if completely honest, I was a little disappointed when he came out, something I firmly take back and apologise for should he ever read this and take any offence - but as that is unlikely, I sharn't lose too much sleep over it.

Highlights for me were (quite childishly) John making the wanker hand jesture to Nicholas Parsons (2nd time unseen by NP which made it all the funnier) and Gyles suggesting hamsters were often found abandoned by motorways.

I was, however, utterly stunned that John was "given the benefit of the doubt" over challenging Paul's claim that owl's were birds of prey...erm...

Also, although I'm sure was meant to be hilarious, I found NP hitting on Shappi very uncomfortable...something very wrong with a man even play hitting on a gal when he is old enough to be her grandfather!

Otherwise it was a very pleasant show...but not one I'll be in a rush to see recorded again. Very pleased it was a freebie.

The Impressionist Gardens Exhibition @ The National Gallery

I shall pre-warn now that this will no doubt be a waffly blog post, and I don't blame you if you skip it.  

Impressionism is my favourite style of art, it's not my only love, but it is my greatest love, as my all time favourite painter was one such artist...Monsieur Oscar Claude Monet.  To discover this exhibition was here whilst I was filled me with great joy, so I set aside a day that I would be going to see it, booked my ticket early to make sure of it.

Overall the exhibition was truly wonderful.  I don't go to galleries or museums anywhere near as much as I want to, and to be honest, have little real excuse as to why not...I mean, I live near London, it's easy enough to access so many of them!

Anyway, a little game I play when I go to a gallery or museum is the "take home" game.  The idea of the game is simple - in each room you enter you are offered the opportunity to take home ONE painting/sculpture/artefact/whatever, so which one do you choose.  What I'm going to write up next is what my choices were for each room...

Room I - The Fleming Room

The Curious One, 1823 - Antoine Pierre Mongin

I chose this one because it was a. very different from any other in the room and b. it was just so cheeky.

Room II - The Royal Bank of Scotland Room

There were several paintings I loved in here.  Simplicity of Daisies, 1892 - Gustav Caillebotte was simply stunning; The Fragrant Air, 1894 - Leon Frederic featured a young golden haired child smelling a flower in amongst a throng of other flowers made for a snapshot of idyllic country childhood; Lotus Lillies, 1888 - Charles Courtney Curran is a painting of Lake Erie in Ohio, where two ladies in their finest are gathering lotus lillies to make the wedding bouquet for one of them.

However the one that I would take home is The Artist's House at Argenteuil, 1873 - Claude Monet

I feel like I'm there, watching little Jean playing with his hoop, a glass of wine in my hand, passing idle chit chat with Claude, his wife having just come out to tell us she's put out some bits to eat. 

Room III

The Luxembourg Gardens at Twilight, 1879 - John Singer Sargent

This scene is so serene.  I'm sitting on a bench after a day wandering around Paris and this is what I am faced with.  I also feel like this looks like a photograph that has been on a slightly longer exposure - giving it a great feeling of movement.

Room IV

Portrait of Karl Nordstrom, 1882 - Christian Krohg

I love the stark contrast between the gentle pastels of the garden viewed through the window by the bold gent.

Room V - Wolfson Room I

In the Sunshine, 1897 -  Johann Viktor Kramer

Struggling to find an online picture of this but will scan from the book when back home. This was the only painting that jumped out in this room, however if honest, it reminded me of a country garden centre.

Room VI

Oh my...water lillies!!!  Four of them in one room, no less!

Of the four, two were particularly amazing, one painted in 1907 and the other in 1908.

1907

1908

I adore Monet's water lillies - how he made the same subject so very different each time.  Both paintings were so beautiful and awe inspiring that I found myself literally moved to tears.  I feel very humbled at having the opportunity to stand in front of such amazing pieces of art.

Show six...Alan Cumming: I Bought a Blue Car Today

Here it is.  The show I was most excited about seeing...Mr Alan Cumming!

Photo from www.edfringe.com

This show was a wonderful mix of cabaret, laughs brought about by his chatting, heartfelt moments and generally feeling like Alan had invited you all back to his place as a group of friends rather than the adoring fans we were.  I don't think there was a person in the place who didn't appreciate the man standing before us on stage.

The songs were a mix of stage tunes, songs that had been written by people he knew that he liked, and stuff he'd written himself...some funny, some meaningful, all beautifully sang.

Alan recounted stories from his past, both long ago and quite recent...having us in stitches or agreeing wholeheartedly or indeed ready to lynch E! online (c*nts is my only opinion of them now - something I'm sure many there last night will agree with!).  He came across as so very tender and genuine - he either was or is truly the greatest actor who walks on this earth.  At times I will admit I saw the Alan who was Bernard...and I smiled.

One of the songs he did was one he wrote for his husband and it was just brilliant.

I swear, I've seen a lot of old favourites so far on this trip, and have quite a few I've not seen before coming up...but honestly, if it wasn't for the viewing of Jim Sweeney's film on Tuesday I would probably look for an alternative train home as I don't think anything will top that show.  For all round entertainment, for the two hours of smiles afterwards, for the glow.

Basically, two words describe this show...choose your preferred out of AWESOME & PHENOMENAL.


To check out more of Alan go to http://www.alancumming.com/blog.php which includes some video diaries of him in Edinburgh!

Photo shamelessly pinched from www.alancumming.com

Show five...Jo Caulfield: Cruel to be Kind

I have a feeling that many of these reviews could end up a little biased as I have, at least for the start of my time here, chosen old favourites of mine...comedians I've seen various times over the years...those I KNOW will make me laugh...and Jo Caulfield is yet another of these.

It was about 9/10 years ago that I first saw Jo perform.  It was The Comedy Store in London, 9/10 acts on for charity...I had booked the ticket because Rob Newman (of The Mary Whitehouse Experience - an object of many teenage fantasies and giggles) was performing...sadly he was overshadowed by two ladies that night, Miss Jojo Smith and Jo Caulfield.  Since then I have seen Jo perform both at Edinburgh every visit, and also been to many radio recordings.

Anyhoo I digress...

Photo thanks to www.edfringe.com

So, Jo's show.  It opened with Jo conducting a small survey to help with an article she's writing for an American magazine about losing your virginity...something the also ends the show as she asks various people about where they lost theirs.

Then we swiftly move on to the rest of the show.  One of the things I love about Jo is she says things that many women think, but never vocalise...or at least, things I think but never vocalise.  I like to imagine Jo is also irritated by the likes of women who apply make-up in public and would be slightly proud of me as I try my best to "accidentally" nudge such ladies, usually on trains.

She goes on to bitch about her "girlie friends" and also her "annoying friend" (and it's true, we do all have them!)...before recounting a fan-fecking-tastic tale (and I do so hope it was true on some level!) of just thinking she recognised someone and ends up meeting up with their fiancee, having dinner with them, only to realise that she has no clue who they are!

The show concludes with the virgin survey, where she asks various members of the audience where they lost there virginities, expanding for more details with many (although I was asked I thankfully didn't have to expand).  Much hilarity over these, details of which you can find on her website & blog...so I won't ruin it. http://www.jocaulfield.com/

The show isn't for those who want a "nice little lady comic" to go and see...but IS for those who want to spend an hour laughing their arses off and finding themselves (often secretly) agreeing with many of the words spilling out of Jo's mouth.


EDIT: Oh and go here... http://blog.jocaulfield.com/ ...I made it onto Jo's site WOOT!

Show four...Paul Merton's Impro Chums

I might as well say it now...this review was always going to be biased.  It has the comedy deity that is Lee Simpson as part of it...enough said!

Photo from http://paulmerton.com/improchums.html

Another impro show, this time starring three of the CSPs and two regular guests - so again, I KNOW it's going to be a good show as I've been watching these guys perform live for 11 years now...and for 20ish years if we backdate to WLIIA & Terry & Julian!

Games from The Store in London on a CSP night were used for the first half, however the second half changes and has Scenes from a Hat (well, bin) - these are suggestions written down by many audience members whilst in the queue - and Shakespeare.  The latter is a game I wish they did more often at The Store.

Highlights for me were Mike and his Welsh-Irish accent, Richard becoming the middle aged baby man vacuum and Lee and Mike being socks in a washing machine.  Suki deserves honourable mention for her fabulous Michael McIntyre impression!!!

Nice to see them in a bigger venue that previous years I've seen them - if there are still tickets available, get yourself one and go seen them.  Alternatively catch them on tour when they go http://paulmerton.com/improchums.html

Show three...Itch: A Scratch Event

Itch (as it shall be known from here on in) was a last minute booking, as we'd had the Tip that Messers Vranch and Frost were going to be on, and quite frankly, we can't get enough of them!

Photo from www.EdFringe.com

The show is a collection of mini shows/sketches/plays/performances, often not really rehearsed...hell, a script might have literally only just been finished moments before a show.  Many of the performers came out holding scripts, something you would think you would notice more than you actually did.  It wasn't long in any of them that I forgot they were even holding them!

The first was KILL PHIL, written by Phil Whelans and starring Phil himself, Ruth Bratt, Stephen Evans and James Wren (please forgive any spelling of names in this blog - I've tried to be accurate).  Armed only with minimal props (mainly chairs) we were treated to a dark/light comedy/play juxtaposition. The opening scene was by the graveside (cardboard coffin shape pinned to black curtain, all actors lay on the floor giving the impression we were viewing from above - very cleverly done!), followed by will reading in the style of a gameshow, followed by slightly insane goings on, including a fabulously creepy housekeeper.

Second was a more serious mini-play, although unsure as to whether they meant it to seem as such - they should, however, not take that as a criticism as I enjoyed it very much.  The story was about a comedian, Kyle, and a very over-eager fan, Sarah.  Scarily I wondered if this was how many of the comedians over the years felt about myself and many other people I know...am I comedian stalker crazy?? (please if any of the comedians I go to see read this just remember people like us mean you get to buy nice things like food and socks!) ...btw I don't *actually* want anyone to answer that...I know I'm at a safe stalker level because not ONCE has a restraining order been applied for...

Up next was Charlyne Yi.  A very brief appearance of her performing a song for her boyfriend who had just dumped her..."so what else could she do except invite him along?" She was literally on for a few minutes...and in those few minutes I got a stitch from laughing.  I am sorely tempted to see if I can fit her show in before I leave, if not, maybe I can catch her playing London some time?

Fourth was a monologue from Stuart Goldsmith...recounting meeting a girl and falling in love...and wasabi. Very sweet and amusing.

Last but by no means least were Richard Vranch and Stephen Frost, who were a pushy showbiz Dad and middle aged son who "wanted to be normal".  Lots of good old humour as well as visual gags, although Frosty's conversation with an inaudible petrol station night attendant was hilarious.

All in all, a very lovely hour which apparently changes to varying degrees on different days.

Edinburgh...Day two

Sunday was anything but a quiet day, so will give a very quick overview of the day with reviews coming separately.

Woke earlyish, before 0800, got up fed, showered, and ready. 

My friend, Chris, was coming to EdFest from Preston on a mammoth mission of seeing five shows before grabbing first train back on Monday morning, something made no less easy by him being in a wheelchair.

I met Chris at Waverley Station and got to the taxi queue to grab a cab up to Pleasance...we waited our turn and got rather miffed when a cab, empty with light on, would rather drive on by than pick up a fare which required him getting out his ramp so the chair could be wheeled on.  Another couple of cabs mysteriously never turned their lights on, but shortly afterwards a very friendly & helpful cabbie stopped and we were on our way up to Pleasance.

We found ourselves a place to settle, grabbed a quick drink, before heading to our first show, Itch: A Scratch Event (very interesting & funny), only to accosted by Mike McShane (he of WLIIA infamy amongst other things).  Lovely chit chat, marred only by the fact I was bursting for the loo!

After Itch, another drink and this time in the company of Mr Stephen Frost and his marvellous eyebrows (look at me name dropping names that only really mean things to Gag Hags!).

Then it was time for Paul Merton's Impro Chums (wonderful as always), followed by another drink, before I handed Chris over to be with my fellow flatmates for the week for the next two shows, whilst I headed across town to see the ever hilarious Jo Caulfield: Cruel to be Kind.

After Jo, back to Pleasance to meet up with Chris...another drink before we decided we would head to Assembly Hall early and have a drink there as we had to wait until midnight for our last show of the night, Alan Cumming: I bought a blue car today.

Outside the Pleasance is a taxi queue...rows of black cabs with their yellow lights shining brightly into the night.  This was where we experienced, yet again, an empty cab, yellow light blazing, look at us before driving off.  My patience by this time was wearing thin, and thankfully the next cabbie was even MORE helpful and friendly than the earlier cabbie.  He also informed us that we could make a complaint about him doing that...he, himself, found it disgusting the cabbie had just driven off.  In we got, and headed to the rear wheelchair access of Assembly Hall...which ironically has the HIGHEST stepped kerb I think I've ever seen!!  Lovely cabbie number 2 gave me the driver number of the earlier cab that drove off, and a complaint will surely be made...

We were swiftly inside Assembly Hall, only to discover (once outside the venue room where Mark Watson was about to go on) that we couldn't get to the bar from this side...only way would be if I wheeled Chris (or Pissed Priss as he shall now be known!) down the Royal Mile and then back up what is a rather steep incline to the front of Assembly Hall.  I asked if it wasn't possible for us just to wait where we were, which the staff kindly let us do. I popped off to the bar again, only to discover no bacardi - I was offered Malibu and almost instantly gagged - and we actually had a jolly old time waiting outside the room.

The staff we got chatting to were all very lovely lads, but the best entertainment came from a group of older ladies and gentlemen (and I mean that with utmost respect and that they really WERE classy folk).  We ended up chatting to them as we all waited together, having giggles.  One of the chaps was an actor in the 40s/50s before becoming a producer of programmes and films...yes yes I really should've asked who he was, but instead I WOWed him with my five year old daughter's brilliant card trick...

Alan was, for want of a better word, AWESOME!!!! I can't wait to write that review...BEST. SHOW. EVER.

Post Alan glow thankfully kept me smiling for the next few hours, because sadly Waverley station was closed, and not open as Pissed Priss had planned (with waiting in the waiting room until the train at 0530ish).  This left us pondering what to do...whereas I could leave him in the safety of a station, I couldn't leave him waiting outside...it's not what mates do.  So we took a wander over to the National Gallery and chatted and waited it out...man alive Edinburgh is cold at 0400!

Once the station opened, I took Pissed Priss in, and then headed back to the flat for some much needed sleep.

So a very long day involving me be up and about for 21 hours...thankfully day three was a chilled not-much-planned day!!!

Reviews to follow...

Show two...Richard Herring - Christ on a Bike

Although only my fourth EdFest, every single one has one thing in common...and that's seeing Richard Herring on the Saturday night. No other night will do.  Has to be the Saturday.

Photo from www.edfringe.com

Oh my, tonight's show was possibly the BEST Richard Herring show I've seen...beats even one where he utters the words "fisting Wee Jimmy Krankie".

This show is a revised version of his 2001 show, with implications that he's improved and added to it, however I can only take his word for it as I've never seen the original outing.

A question posed is "Is RH the second coming of Christ?"

Richard explores many many avenues in both his and Jebus' lives...he also points out some very obvious problems in the bible, such as the fact that the commandments appear to have been made up on the spot rather than thought through before final release.

As one expects from Herring, he is very close to the line...in fact, sometimes he is so far over the line that the line is a mere speck in the distance...and I LOVE THAT! That he is STILL so un-pc...not in a Bernard Manning/Chuckie Brown "stuck in the 70s" way...but in a "seriously Richard, just save me that seat in Hell next to you" way.

By far and away the most impressive section is on the New Testament...I shan't reveal stuff as it's not the done thing...but blimey, how he remembered the stuff he did, well...

So definitely one to recommend, even if you aren't up in Edinburgh, I think he is probably touring with it afterwards...and even if he isn't everyone should watch him live at least once in their life.  Check out his website http://www.richardherring.com/ for more information and also he has a very good blog to follow.

First show done - The Rupert Pupkin Collective

First show is over...the 2010 show cherry was taken by the marvellous gents of The Rupert Pupkin Collective at the Debating Hall at The Gilded Balloon Teviot.

Pic from www.edfringe.com

The Rupert Pupkin Collective are Steve Steen, Stephen Frost, Andy Smart, Ian Coppingger and Dave Johns...so unsurprisingly to me, I utterly loved it.

The show begins much as a show of The Comedy Store Players do - it's also an impro show, and given that Andy is a CSP, and the rest of the gents are regular guests, well... 

For me, once they'd moved away from what I would see as the "regular" CSP games, I nearly wet myself. HUGE belly laughs.  Turning the life of a chap called Derek from Dunfermline, who was a retired engineer with a Dire Straits fixation, and met his wife Kate in The Shetlands...this was pure comedy gold!

The dubbed Sherlock Holmes adventure was brilliant...but complete highlight for me had to be during Film & Theatre styles game, with the suggestion of Chinese Acrobatic Theatre, Ian did some outstanding acrobatic moves including the very daring jumping off a chair!  Made all the funnier because Ian makes Stevie Steen look tall!

Popped back to the apartment (yay I found it on my own) to change footwear, then I'm off in search of food before Richard Herring tonight.